Saturday, May 28, 2011

Will tigers blood secure you from an alien infiltration on your apartments and real estate in Rio de Janeiro?

By Ronaldo Gaucho


Before you start reading this article I have some careful instructions for you. Immediately go into your kitchen and locate some aluminum foil. All apartments needs to be stocked with this crucial supply. If you can't find any in the kitchen, just go to the local Rio de Janeiro grocery store and you are therefore sure to find some for sale. Do that now. I'm waiting.

Okay, you have the aluminum foil? Now encapsulate it around your head but in the end make a long stick of aluminum foil off the top of your head. The taller the better. This helps keep them from controlling you. Okay, now that that's been completed, you'll want to go to the penthouse level of your building, it will give you the best reception and it will shield you from the mind reading waves. This piece of real estate is the best site for you at the moment.

Now that you have taken the necessary precautions, you should now understand that even though you've made the choice to seek out apartments that are in Rio de Janeiro, this kind of real estate is no longer safe and sound. Historically, from the time of Hollywood's beginning, it has been documented that aliens only go to the United States and they only speak English. Unfortunately, because Brazil is becoming a larger participant on the world stage, they are also starting to captivate aliens and an invasion could be impending. Before long, your penthouse overlooking Copacabana and Ipanema could be flooded with the bald green skinned rascals. You've been informed.

So how will you defend yourself from the alien attack of Rio de Janeiro? Well fortunately knowledge is power, and now you know. You were fortunate enough to find some aluminum foil for sale, but you can't just let yourself be the only person to know. That would be self-centered. You need to start dispersing this information. So without delay, at this moment, you should go and run through the streets of Copacabana and Ipanema screaming, "Aliens are coming!"

It's crucial that you do this. The aliens aren't here on holiday. They didn't travel here for a vacation. They came here for a very certain piece of real estate, Earth. Sadly, our apartments are located here, so we all have a stake in this. Last time I checked, we didn't put the Earth up for sale.




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